Out of many facts about me, the fact that I am an assault survivor was not an issue I ever thought I would need to discuss on my outdoor blog. Unfortunately I was outed by an organised group of trolls and gaslighters who were constantly haranguing me on my outdoor sites. I really resented feeling pressured into confiding about this issue on my blog, rather than here on my personal site.
And so – I am still feeling my way around how to express this issue. Although I have fought not to let aggression towards me as a child affect the present, moving back to Newcastle meant that those old fears began to affect all aspects of my life.
Since my twenties I have successfully used techniques from a type of cognitive therapy to help me to overcome my anxieties and remain positive. To this end I set myself various targets to master (it doesn’t matter how small they are). I then make a list of how I will achieve those targets and continually appraise my own progress in achieving each aim towards my ultimate goal. At first my targets were tiny things which seemed huge at the time, like going for a walk.
I used to write it all down but I have been using these techniques for so long that they are totally internal now. I have rarely explained them like this, as I’ve never considered it to be all that interesting to anyone other than myself. The techniques may not work for everyone but they continue in the background, whatever else is happening in my life.
To illustrate using an example of this process, I often set targets which challenge or conquer my fears, so I set myself a target to become experienced at wild camping on my blog. To achieve that target I set five goals:
To set myself some hard and fast challenges which would give me a reason to wild camp, and some deadlines to work towards. (I made the mistake of sharing an early challenge on Twitter, and it was savaged by trolls).
To gradually assemble a kit in which I have confidence.
To progress gradually from bed and breakfasts to wild camping on my long distance trails.
To seek advice and support if needed. Some people have been very helpful (hopefully they will know who they are, and who they are not).
To recognise when people are trying to undermine me.
I can only hope that some good will come of my making this post, and that these methods may be helpful to some readers. My advice is not to share it on public social media platforms such as Twitter, as trolls can and will undo the work of twenty years in half an hour if you let them. Remember that this is entirely their problem and not yours. Hopefully social media safety people will realise this eventually and toughen up their responses.
I am selling some limited run signed postcard sets of various designs from selected film and theatre projects. 10% from every sale goes to Crisis UK, the charity for the homeless. To order any item/s please use the contact form to let me know your requirements.
Set of 6 Assorted Costume Postcards – £2.50
These postcards are taken from original drawings for various theatre and film projects. Each set of 147mm x 104mm postcards is printed on matt recycled card and comes in a clear, sealed polypropylene pack. This assorted pack includes the following costume designs:
Queen Victoria. Early Morning by Edward Bond.
Lucette Gautier. Cat among the Pigeons by George Feydeau.
Baz. Hard Feelings by Doug Lucie.
Lodovico. The White Devil by John Webster.
Baroness Duverger. Cat among the Pigeons by George Feydeau.
Comic character design.
Set of 4 Queen Victoria Costume Postcards – £2.00
This set of 4 matching postcards shows a costume design for Queen Victoria from Early Morning by Edward Bond. The 138mm x 107mm cards are are printed on matt recycled card and come in a sealed, clear polypropylene pack.
I have uploaded a set of three showreels to highlight the different specialisms within my design work. Take a look at my YouTube Channel to view my Design, Costume and Set showreels on my Showreels playlist.